


Wondering When I’m Coming Home

by TheLastWhiteRose



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, I didn’t outwardly say it but it happened, If you squint it’s there, Its up to you to decide what, M/M, Mutual Pining, OOC, Pining, Suggestive Themes, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2021-01-26 12:43:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21374344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLastWhiteRose/pseuds/TheLastWhiteRose
Summary: Felix decides to make up for lost time. His kiss is gentle, almost reverent. It’s a far cry from the frantic, open-mouthed mess of night of the ball. Felix wants this to last, and so it does. When they finally separate, they’re both out of breath, panting for the troublesome air that keeps them apart.“I thought you liked the manbun,”
Relationships: Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Sylvain Jose Gautier, Sylvain Jose Gautier & Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 2
Kudos: 80





	Wondering When I’m Coming Home

**Author's Note:**

> Guess who’s pining again???? I actually (surprisingly) don’t have a crush right now, or at least I’m telling myself that. I’m kind of going through a crisis, so expect lots more fanfiction to come. Please excuse the manbun love, I love manbuns, the way to my heart is manbun, literally stab me.

“It’s been a while.”

That was the understatement of the century. It had been four years, eleven months and twenty-seven days since the last time he’d seen him. Sylvain had left unexpectedly, leaving only a note with some vague bullshit about House Gautier and an emergency. Felix hadn’t blamed him. Anyone with eyes could see the obvious affection Sylvain felt for the professor, and when she’d disappeared into the ether, it had affected all of them. Especially Sylvain.

He’s gotten even taller since the last time Felix has seen him, but his bulk fills out his height. The old Felix would’ve wanted to spar with him, to test out those muscles for himself. It was an easy excuse. Back then, it seemed like that was life’s consolation gift to him, where the closest Felix would get to Sylvain was when he was straddling him, a sword pressed to his throat and those pink lips of his whispering “I yield”. Before that night at the ball, where Sylvain cornered him, effectively caging him between the wall of the Goddess Tower and his hard, lean body. 

Felix doesn’t tell Sylvain that he wishes that night never happened. He doesn’t tell Sylvain that every time he sees him, his body flushes with heat, and he can’t bear to look at him without imagining what those lips had done to him in the dead of the night. He wants to, so badly it hurts, but he doesn’t, because Byleth is back, and given the choice between him and Byleth, he knows what Sylvain will choose. Again, he doesn’t blame him. If he were in Sylvain’s position, he’d choose her too. 

Instead, he clears his throat, lowers his eyes, and nods. “Yeah, it has. Far too long.” He keeps his mouth shut about the unsent “dinner invitations”, the letters he’d written that had disappeared under the flame of a candle, lest he show any sign of weakness. 

There’s something in Sylvain’s eyes that scares Felix. It’s raw, unfiltered emotion, the kind that only a man desperately in love can have. He must’ve seen Byleth beforehand. The thought twists at Felix, but he suppresses the envy he feels for the professor. It’s not her fault the man he loves loves her. 

They chat banally about territory and the new dukedom, of the futility of the fight against Cornelia. It’s awkward, stilted conversation, and Felix can’t recall when it had ever been like this. When had things gotten so complicated between them? Even after they’d done...that, conversation had always been easy. 

“Byleth’s back,” Sylvain says finally, and he almost looks sheepish. “So’s Dimitri. Funny how we lost both of them at nearly the same time, and we get both of them back.”

Felix snorts. “The Boar Prince seems real happy about that. He’s been avoiding her like the plague ever since.”

“So have you,” responds Sylvain. Those piercing brown eyes of his force Felix’s stare upwards. “I know you and her have your differences, but she’d really like to see you. You were always her best student, at least when it came to swordsmanship.”

The thought that Byleth had discussed his performance in school with Sylvain left Felix with a bitter taste in his mouth. “Since when were you her messenger? If she wants to talk to me, she can come up to me herself.”

A sigh escapes from Sylvain. “You can’t just avoid her forever.”

“Watch me.”

“You know,” Sylvain says, and Felix can tell by the grit in his voice that he’s angry. “For all the kindness that the Professor has shown you, for every sparring match that she allotted, you could at least give her the courtesy of speaking to her.”

“Right, yeah. Of course you’d want me to talk to her, because you’re fucking in love with her!”

The statement shocks both of them. For a moment, neither of them says anything. After all, what would there be to say? To Felix, it was a common fact, known by everyone that Sylvain was unabashedly in love with the professor. 

“What?” Sylvain splutters, and his anger turns into confusion. “I’m not in love with her, I’m in love with you, you idiot! I slept with you!”

“Yeah, and the day after, you’re out mooning over the Professor. Yeah, that gives a real indication that you want to fuck me again; flirting with the fucking professor of our class.”

His voice breaks at the end of the sentence, and Felix is surprised to find a couple tears streaming down his cheeks. He wipes them away furiously, ashamed that he let Sylvain have such a profound effect on him.

“I flirt with everybody! Felix, I hated her! I hated her for her Crest, how she never had to suffer the same injustice we did.” He takes a deep, gasping breath, as if the weight of his words knocked the wind out of him. “It’s always been you, Felix. You and that stupid fucking manbun of yours, never giving me a goddamn chance to  _ think _ , to work through my feelings for you.”

The revelation astounds Felix. For years, he’d suffered silently as Sylvain flirted with girl after girl, leaving heart after heart broken in his wake. When he’d found Byleth, he could’ve sworn that any hope for a cohesive relationship with Sylvain was lost. All the time that he’d spent angsting over him, he could’ve been tucked underneath Sylvain’s arm.

Felix decides to make up for lost time. His kiss is gentle, almost reverent. It’s a far cry from the frantic, open-mouthed mess of night of the ball. Felix wants this to last, and so it does. When they finally separate, they’re both out of breath, panting for the troublesome air that keeps them apart. 

“I thought you liked the manbun,” murmurs Felix against Sylvain’s lips. He pulls back just far enough to speak, but close enough that they share the same breath. 

“I only liked it because I liked  _ you _ ,” snaps Sylvain, and he tilts his head down to meet Felix’s lips again. “Your hair looks better now, but it’s a shame I won’t have an anchor when you’re on your knees an-“

Felix cuts him off abruptly, opting instead to take his hand and lead him to their old dormitory. When they’re sated, Felix is underneath Sylvain’s arm, his head on his bare chest. He’s just barely awake, but he’s awake enough to feel the gentle peck of Sylvain’s lips against his forehead and the soft, nearly inaudible truth he whispers. 

“It’s always been you.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed this, kudos and comments are appreciated!


End file.
